Wednesday, October 24, 2012 Military Robots are Coming to Get You

As part of its never-ending mission to spend taxpayer money on the things that will eventually kill us all, DARPA is helping to develop a robot that can surmount any obstacle in its quest to wrap its steely claws around your throat.

That's right, you can't even climb a flight of stairs to escape it the way you would a Dalek or a particularly lazy attack dog:

DARPA claims the robot is to be used for rescue missions in environments too hazardous for human beans.  But the "D" in "DARPA" stands for "the Defense Department", so the only thing this robot is going to rescue anyone from is breathing.

To make things worse, this isn't the only robot being developed under the program.  In fact, DARPA is sponsoring a competition to see which well-meaning but ultimately short-sighted group of techies can create the deathbot that will usher in the Age of the Machines.  Start stocking up on depleted uranium rounds now.