Thursday, October 15, 2009 B-Movie Heaven

I worked in a video store back in the late '80's. You spend a lot of time watching trailers to all sorts of films, from classics to the latest Direct-To-Video crap. And you talk with your co-workers about the movies you've seen and the movies you'd like to see. One I had always fantasized about was a DTV version of the star-studded action movies of yore like The Magnificent Seven, The Great Escape, and The Dirty Dozen. How awesome it would have been to see the likes of Chuck Norris, Van Damme, Steven Seagal, Jackie Chan, Steve James, and Dolph Lundgren mixing it up together in one film!

Fast-forward some twenty years, and the intertubes buzzed with the news the Sly Stallone was actually going to make that movie. Rumors swirled about who was and wasn't going to be in the film, but the confirmed cast of Stallone, his old buddy Dolph, Jason Statham, and Jet Motherfuckin' Li was enough to hook me.

And now the first footage has been leaked onto the web. It's a promo trailer used to sell the film to distributors, so it's not as polished as one you might see in the theaters. But it's leaving me as giddy as a schoolgirl on prom night.

In addition to the main cast, the trailer features Mickey Rourke, Eric Roberts, Randy Couture, and Steve Austin. A cameo from Ahnold had been rumored for months, and if the IMDB is to believed we're also getting appearances from Bruce Willis, Danny Trejo, DTV vet Gary Daniels, and Charisma "How I've Missed Lusting After Her" Carpenter. Jean-Claude Van Damme was offered a major role, but took a pass on the project. The big tool.

I haven't been this excited about a movie in a long time. Seriously, if you're fan of action flicks, you need to check out the trailer before it gets taken down. And it will get taken down. Apparently, movie studios don't like it when people help promote their upcoming films. The big tools.